well dearest interwebs

thank you for letting me be raw and real and belt it all out!

here is some more:

i did NOT get the job i interviewed for last week (yea, i know, sorry i didn't tell you.)

i wasn't really looking for a job until this interview presented itself. then i got myself all hopped up on mountain dew about it, and, well here we are.

i am embarrassed.

i thought i nailed the interview. (i still think i did.)

in my heart, i still feel like i am the best candidate for the job (of course!) and that it is their loss.

i may have gone home and cried about it for a few hours minutes.

but now i am back at work: thankful i have a job (with benefits), a great marriage (with benefits), and a beautiful, healthy child.

(but i can still be sad.)

(and binge drinking is acceptable in this situation, yes?)

that is all. carry on.

dance dance dance

daycare forgot to feed my baby a bottle yesterday.

the director ignored my phone call (to her) about it. (an employee called me back and we talked about it.)

(honestly, i wouldn't be so riled up if they would have handled it better.)

they are switching rooms and teachers again. and they don't want nate to go with his favorite teacher. (i asked. figured it couldn't hurt. (his teacher suggested i ask.))

mama is OFFICIALLY looking for a new child care solution. thoughts?

the people at his daycare are, truly, wonderful and caring folks. and it is a positive environment. i just feel the need for some stability for my child. i wonder if any of the other mamas at his daycare have similar issues. am i the only one?!?! maybe i am just crazy.

some folks at work made me very angry today.

not even a cold domestic beer made it better.

i just don't understand why people can't do their jobs. (and, maybe, why i feel like i have to do it for them? can i please not feel like an assistant to EVERYONE IN THE WORLD my whole life?)

i am anxiously awaiting some other news... that would make karl and i very happy. (non pregnancy or baby related thank you very much.)

karl and i were hoping that 2009 would be The Year of Change. And it will be. But right now, as we are on the brink of the dreaded month of February, it doesn't feel like it.

(but it will be. because we will make it so.)

(that last little parenthesis is me being positive. cause i need to be.)

is this week over yet?

nuggets of internet goodness post!

nate needs these. 7 months. that isn't too young for ear piercing, right?

nate also needs dirt. dirty. (sing it like Christina Aguilera.)

what else have i found in the interwebs lately?

four more months of ads re: digital tv 'switchover.' boo on that.

for the preggos: midwife article.

what else?

is it just me or are these a little creepy for everyday use? maybe not quite snuggie creepy...

an interesting article about healthcare reform. it is long, but worth the read. (i think anyway.)

here is a fun ninja keychain.

further proof that girls are, ahem, evil. wow, texas, wow. how could their fans (and parents!) even watch this without feeling like horrible people? i mean, i am all about competition (i consider myself a former athlete ☺) but, seriously, there is a concept called 'sportsmanship' and more people need to grasp it. i hope this PRIVATE CHRISTIAN HIGH SCHOOL coach gets fired.

in tv land:
boo on the biggest loser's portrayal of birth. ha. dad walks in through OR doors, two seconds later walks out OR doors with a clean little bundle and declares "it's a boy!" so very realistic. i realize the show is about weight loss not birth, but come on. also, kurt warner on BL? loved it.

lost. whatever. i can't decide whether i am in love with or in hate with that show. kate makes me want to punch my hand through my television. much like ms. 'i'm-all-dark-and-twisty' mere mere on gray's anatomy. (which i no longer watch.)

private practice. um. i didn't just cry at private practice last week. i sobbed. like my best friend was dying. it was ugly.

ugly betty. delish as usual. though the rumors that it is being cancelled? SO SAD.

how i met your mother. not new this week. sad. my favorite sitcom on air. ever.

it's always sunny in philadelphia. (netflix.) just watched the 'dennis and dee get a new dad' episode. wow. so wrong yet so funny.

well i am getting WORDY, so i hope you could relate to at least one of these little blurbs...

xoxo,
gossip girl

(this is where i realize i watch too much tv after the baby is asleep! thank you, dvr!)

(this is also where i realize the AR weatherpersons have LIED AGAIN and I will be going to work tomorrow. but nate PROBABLY won't go to daycare (he didn't go today.) ☂ All we have seen is RAIN ☂ and they keep lessening the inclement weather forecast. DAMN THE PANIC (and the hope!).)

7 months, 1 day

s.u.n.d.a.y

it's always sunny in philadelphia. burn after reading. chicken corn chowder. homemade nachos. a tooth. painting in the office. wii tennis with karl. videoing that babe. cold mik. sunflower seeds. coca cola. google reader. approximately 400 loads of laundry. lots of naterade giggles.

there is a tooth in there. wait. why is there a tooth in there?

so, yeah, today, we are hanging out. karl, me, nate... nothing special... just sitting around, when karl says (with his finger being gnawed on in nate's mouth), "I feel a tooth."

at first, i didn't believe him. i was all "wait. what? no. let me feel." and i stuck my little pinky finger in and ran it along his little gums and, sure enough, there was a little razor peeking through those bottom gums.

what the hell?

for some reason, this one barely-there tooth made me VERY emotional. (and, seriously, it is barely busted through the surface. you have to squint REAL close to even see it.)

one, karl found it. and i love karl and karl loves nate and we are one little loving family and what not, but i spend all day every day (yes, that is most definately an exageration) reading about babies and development and milestones and diapers and baby food and what they should eat and when they should eat it and googling things like "the cough kind of sounds barky but there is no rattling in his chest." (you MIGHT argue i research a little TOO much, but i am just trying to keep that little baby healthy and happy. oh, yea, and alive.) so, i felt semi-robbed when karl discovered this particular milestone. isn't the obsessive parent supposed to notice these HUGE milestones FIRST? hmph. jealous.

two, and i may be completely niave here, but aren't babies supposed to freak out when thier teeth are coming in? not a peep out of nate in the past few days. maybe a little extra drool... but daycare this week said he has been 'exceptionally happy' (which is decidely better than 'he is not as fussy as he normally is' or 'he has been sad today'.) not the first, and CERTAINLY not the last time, nate has surprised me.. tee hee.. that's not the way babies are "supposed to" get their first tooth, right? what is up with this kid? i am sure i will have future teething woes to share and that i should be happy he barely seemed to notice this first little guy (and i am happy; just surprised.)

three, A TOOTH? i swear just yesterday he couldn't even hold his little wobble-head up on his own. for some irrational reason, that TOOTH signifies the first time i thought, "this kid is growing up fast." people always say, 'he is getting so big' and 'they change so fast' or something along those lines and i always smile and nod and semi-agree. but a TOOTH? that wasn't there this morning and then just APPEARED? uh, yea. that feels like kind of a big deal.

i am so clueless. and i love it and hate it all at the same time.

ok, off to google things like "painless teething" and "razor sharp baby teeth" (kidding.) (ish.)

6 months, 4 weeks, 1 day

this is stupid but i wasted my time so you are getting to see it

Get your own Family Sticker

there comes a time in every parents life

when THIS (see above) is necessary.

for inauguration day

i got a free abortion doughnut from Krispy Kreme (i did! for real!) and some obama condoms.

(I am not making light of the Inaugural Proceedings.)

(Though i did like that the actual swearing in was butchered in 18 ways. if i was barack or michelle i might have giggled up there on that podium.)

lucia has a pretty mama.

the baby showers have begun. ready? go! little lucia will be here in approximately 6 weeks. nate can not wait to meet his future girlfriend.

brooke made the most darling watermelon fruit baby carriage thingey. i just love it so.

some photos courtesy of jax! more on her bloggity.

some of us plan (jenny), some of us make the foods beautiful (brooke), and some of us take pictures (jax). it is really the perfect combination. right?

i have a lot to say, really, but my fingers aren't typing my thoughts correctly, so i will leave you with this: i adore my tulsa girls. in addition to the shower, jenny, brooke, and i spent most of the weekend on the couch in our pajamas. thursday before i left i spent the evening with my arkansas girls. awesome. it was one of the happiest weekends i have had in a while.

moral? go out and send love notes to your girlfriends. pretty sure i couldn't make it without mine.

todays schedule oh todays schedule (i am singing it like todays special)

3 a.m.
hear a restless cough from the crib (i swear every noise wakes me up!)... baby keeps sleeping. (in fact, he went to bed at 6p.m. b/c he only took 1 hour and 45 minutes worth of naps yesterday at daycare.)
5 a.m.
giggling, squealing.
5:20 a.m.
coughing, fussing. dogs start running around the house begging to eat their breakfast. (COLLARS JINGLING AT TOP VOLUME i might add.)
5:30 a.m.
drag self to crib; baby smiles delightedly! comes to bed with us. snuggle up. ahhhh!
5:45 a.m.
FINE! i will make you a bottle!
5:50 a.m.
6 ounces downed. time to go back to bed for all of us!
7:00 a.m.
alarm. cripes. how is it 7? i have to be at work at 8.
7:12 a.m.
cripes. is that karl in the shower? how did i fall asleep again? (my face is right up next to those chubby cheeks.)
7:30 a.m.
i am up, i am dressed, my makeup is on. (er, well, ish.) today is going to be a jeans day! (again, cripes!)
7:35 a.m.
time for some baby B-a-n-a-n-a-n-a-n-a-SSSS. the baby loves them. nom nom nom.
7:45 a.m.
there is rushing. bottles and extra clothes thrown into diaper bag. coat and hat for baby. carseat. car warming. granola bars grabbed. (but not eaten.)
8:00 a.m. (please note this is the time i should be at work this morning.)
pick baby up from high chair to transfer to carseat. wait, what is that? ANOTHER DIAPER EXPLOSION! WOO HOO!! (i promise they really don't happen often but when they do they are at the most inopportune times!)
8:45 a.m.
finally arrive at work. email says 'downloading 1 of 49 emails'. ARGH!! get them out of my inbox!

also, i would like to note: no matter how early i get up, step 7:45 a.m. happens EVERY morning. ha!

stickshifts and safety belts

sunday night pictures - here we are!

the weekend was boring. boring. boring. AND i liked it.

positive patty

ahem. collective awwwwww please. ;)

positivity is shining through. and i shall share.

two baby boys were born yesterday - karl's sister kristen delivered a healthy little boy 6lbs, 11 oz...i believe the final name is ryan christopher. and some coworkers welcomed jackon hunter to the world (a bit early) at 3lbs 7oz. my sources tell me that both babies are happy and busy getting loved and kissed. i love the thought of both of these families going through the emotions and awesomeness of birth on the same day in cities across the country. (and it happens everyday!)

oh babies. you make the world go round.

i had to find a pic of nate from day 1. he is approximately 12 hours old in that shot.

negative nancy

wow. negative is the best word i can use to describe my work environment at the moment. wow. i myself am guilty of being uber-negative this week and complaining about A LOT. it just feels like no one wants to help anyone out and everyone wants to point the finger. i realize i am speaking in broad generalities here, but it has been a bit of a busy and frustrating week. i was hoping to start 2009 with a better work attitude but am struggling to find the patience. toxic.

eh, boring stuff, i know!

here is some more boring stuff:

nate has also been getting TERRIBLE reports from daycare this week. (read: he cries "all the time" there and refuses to or is unable to nap for an extended period. and i am pretty sure they aren't exagerrating b/c i go over for lunch and he is hoarse and hiccupey like he has been tearful.) i realize that we are coming off a two week break where he was with us or family and friends all the time, but still. please understand i am not blaming *yeech* or accusing them of causing his tears (really i feel somehow, possibly irrationally like the "blame" falls on me as a parent.) i just think maybe it is time for a change. he is generally a pretty happy dude at home. i think he is too young to really "hate daycare," but i am going to start looking around at other options/daycares. i really like the people at his daycare, but i just don't know that his needs are being fully met there. my mama instincts say no. however, then i wonder: would i feel that way about any daycare? maybe. maybe not. this is the first year of operation for this particular program, and things are changing there constantly. they expanded the program, opened a new classroom, switched the kids around, switched the teachers around. i know they are trying to find what works best for them and that is great for them, not so great for me (well, for nate who is an extension of me). i don't know! i am just blabbering about it. it helps to write it out. thanks for listening, dear internets.

we did take him to the doctor today for his 6 month appointment and shots (yea, yea, a little late.) He weighed in at a whopping 18 lbs and 12 ounces and is 27 inches long. i have no idea what these statistics mean or where they are on the percentile scale, but the doc said he was just wonderful and growing. now let me tell you about his shots. he had an oral vax (for rotavirus) and he ate it up like it was candy. he had two shots today. big needles. didn't cry for the first one (turned a bit red and had a look of wild concern on his little face). cried for like two seconds with the second shot. i picked him up and he SMILED. shit you not. (sorry for the cursing but we had just finished talking to the doctor about his 'crying issues' at daycare.) seriously i would tell you the truth if he cried. no lies on this blog. HOW does he cry all day at daycare but stick a big freaking needle in his leg and he sheds not one tear. (I DONT GET IT BABY. PLEASE LEARN HOW TO TALK AND TELL ME ALL YOUR FEELINGS.)

so, anyway, yea. this blog is self-involved and pretty much sucks. deal with it. i can't be witty and charming ALL THE TIME.

6 mo, 1 wk, 5 days

things you learn when you have a shite-y sleeper baby

1. your husband is VERY poor at reading lips when one of you is holding a sleeping babe. VERY poor.

2. your dogs don't actually understand "come here" when you wave your hands around like a windmill b/c their collars are jingling. (to get them in the other room)

also, i have two mosqito bites (!!) from the 77 degree day of playing saturday and today there is ice on the trees!

..ain't got a clue... why my cutlass blue

so one of things i love about going to st. louis is the blues, cardinals, and rams gear we get for the babe.

for sunday pics this week you get a St. Louis EXPLOSION! cute, right? i can't wait for baseball to start again! hopefully, nater-tot remembers all those games we watched in utero (why did pregnancy make me OBSESS about baseball!? we shall never know!) i am expecting Nate Nater to be a big fan thank you very much.

i am feeling optimistic about 2009 today. today i am updating the calendar, doing laundry, making a roast, hanging with the baby... my goals (not a big "resolution" person) this year are to simplify life as much as possible, spend more time 'unplugged' with my husband and babe, and enjoy the year. and, maybe, talk about another baby. we both have several career goals this year, so the whole baby thing will depend heavily on those! karl says "let's make it through nate's first birthday first." (before we talk about having another.) i say "ok!" AND you better believe we will be having a big party for his birthday! I am not a huge birthday celebrator but year one gets a party for sure! Mark your calendars for June 26. i will probaby decorate the blue bathroom. (maybe he should have his cake in there - that is where he had his first meal after all!)

you know it's 2009 when you whip out your iPhone, find youtube, and pull up a Baby Einstein video to distract Nate.

his 6 month appointment is this week (a little late b/c of the holidays!). i expect nothing shy of "perfectly healthy" from the doc. (please lord.)

6 months, 1 week, 2 days

some things we put away this weekend

and just like that: the holidays are past and we can look forward to 2009.

here are few things that got packed up this year!

1. nater boots. made by gigi. the perfect shoes for nate's first christmas!
2. the new stocking. that, oddly, matches karl's 1980 stocking. both made by gigi. she's a crafty one!
3. the new ornaments (a few). the proud new parents is from my mom. adorable, no?

they are IN THE ATTIC. with my breast pump!

safe. (say it like an umpire.)

so, karl and i may LOOK happy to be ringing in 2009 together, but I can assure you our brief jaunt to OKC for a dear friends wedding was fraught with ridiculousness after ridiculousness.

(small example: we thought we would go put the baby down between the wedding (which we took him to and i spent in the cryroom) and reception at sarah&matts (where we were staying; they graciously housed us and offered to keep an eye on the babe) so we could hit the reception sans baby but it took over an hour to put him down, then we got semi-lost in the NYE craziness thanks to our oh-so-new and awesome GPS....and didn't get to the reception until, oh, 11.) (there is more but i will spare you the details.)

it was worth it to go and see the big, happy smiles from both matt and natalie (ze bride and ze groom), but MAN are we running on low today. (and we both have to work tomorrow catching up on being out Wednesday AND daycare is still closed tomorrow! yea!) i wouldn't have changed going - the wedding was beautiful and we are so happy for these two. we are lucky to have wonderful friends.

i think we realized traveling with nate is harder on all of us than we realize (especially in the car) and doing it back to back (with stl last week) and throwing in - oh i don't know - the HOLIDAYS - is trying. plus, does anyone else think the way Christmas and New Years fell this year SUCKED? Ugh, i do. i do.

however, there were fireworks from the 35th floor at midnight. AND i got a new years kissy kiss. AND there was a chapel made of cheese. (with little egg&olive people). somehow that made everything okay. (do you think it's hollow? Or just one enorm-o block? do they cut the chapel up and use it for future cheese cubes or do they have to pitch it? ALL THESE UNANSWERED QUESTIONS ABOUT CHEESE CHAPELS!! don't you just want to take a little bite out of the steeple?)

catching up on emails in the AM. is it wrong that i thought "i will figure out my resolutions tomorrow?" HA.