pretending pregnancy

so, real quick, i have to tell you that nate and i were running late to go to his little gym class this morning and i skipped breakfast. instead i gulped down a vitamin and chugged half a bottle of gatorade. this vitamin/gatorade combo had a seriously ILL EFFECT on me. halfway there, i started feeling pretty nauseous and like i was going to vom. i did what any normal person would do and dumped out my diaper bag all over the front seat just in case (if you are going to spew, spew in this style) of emergency spontaneous vomiting. i made it to the next light (the michaels/pizza hut/academy sports parking lot) and the saliva was FLOWING so i pulled in the back of the lot, opened my door, and threw up a bunch of liquid gatorade! honestly, it was fine. i was fine. just needed to get it out! this poor man with his umbrella and backpack sees me from the road and comes running over to check on me (how sweet, right?) and i TOLD HIM I WAS PREGNANT. cause i was real embarrassed to be puking, half in a parking spot, baby in the backseat, head hanging out the door! and i wanted to make him feel better (!!) (what is wrong with me?) and assure him i was fine and not THE DYING (cause i wasn't even sick AND am most certainly not pregs.) he said congratulations with a big goofy, knowing grin!

i mean REALLY. i feel ridiculous about the whole thing. pretending to be pregnant. that's the kind of karma that gets you knocked up real quick, right? JESUS MARY AND JOSEPH.

blog comments powered by Disqus