so there was this one time i signed up to be a soccer coach...

So.  Let's discuss children and ACTIVITIES, yes?  Thus far in his short 4 years, 2 months and 5 days, Nate has taken a six-week soccer lesson session (total bust) and a spring t-ball league (he loved it; most of his teammates lost interest).  

I've been a little concerned about over-scheduling the kids and ourselves (especially with dragging the baby along) but listen: my kid has SO much energy.  And he likes to play sports.  All of them.  He asks me to sign him up for things all the time.  Baseball, football, basketball, soccer. (The low point was one day we were using some colored tape for an art project and he asked, "Mommy, can you sign me up for tape?")  He's energetic and overly social so, seriously, activities are good for him.  School is fantastic for him.  (Karl and I were both excessively shy as children so it's funny to have this extroverted 4 year old boy child living among us,  popping out of the car eagerly at school every single day and talking to basically anyone and everyone in public.)  

As of right now, we're sort of testing things out one activity at a time... trying not to get too crazy and tentatively trying to discover what he's interested in. And, honestly (LET THE RECORD SHOW), if he asked repetitively for some strangish activity (Is 4 too young for larping?) we would let him try whatever.  (Maybe they really do have 'tape' lessons?)

But that's not what you want to hear about now is it?  You want to hear the crazy part about how all my soccer mom dreams are coming true!  (Apparently, I take the whole soccer mom title VERRRRY literally.)  Well, to be honest, it's really not that crazy at all.  I like kids.  I like soccer.  I have a REALLY loud yelling voice.  I played recreational and competitive soccer (school and club) through high school.  I am by no means a good player but I'm not the worst either.   I have babies in bathrooms - surely I can handle a gaggle of four year olds on a soccer field, right? 

So I signed up.  

I went to an informational (and required) coaches meeting.  I didn't realize it would be for the whole club (they go to U18) and I didn't realize it would be so official.  (Read: I showed up in jeans and a tank top (SHOCKING) with the baby on my hip (ALSO SHOCKING) and the rest of the room was filled with older dudes in work clothes.  Oops.)  I almost left.  They gave our age group a Master List of all the Under-5 players and we were supposed to pick our teams.  They play 3 versus 3 at this age so I only needed 6 kids.  I stared at the list uncomprehendingly while the other coaches MADE LISTS.  I finally just picked all the kids from Nate's school and all the kid's from his friend Harrison's school.  When I turned it in, the other coach was all "Are any of them really good?"  I DON'T KNOW DUDE.  THEY'RE FOUR.  (I did not say that, but, really, if I can keep them on the field the whole game, that's an accomplishment, right?)  

Regardless, we had our first practice this week. 



I have a team full of boys! (though, for the record, there are many girls in the league).   Karl helped me coach.  (Go team.) 

Here's what I've learned so far: 
  • When you don't know what to do next Option 1: RUN!  (They possibly loved the running more than the soccer.) 
  • When you don't know what to do next Option 2: DRINK BREAK!  (Drinks  = Very Important.) 
So far, so good.

DRINK BREAK.  (You can have wine.)   


7 times 7 times 7...does anybody have a calculator

I so thought it was our 8th anniversary.   Wrong.   Just the 7th.  "JUST" THE SEVENTH.  (How?!)

At midnight I tweeted this: 

I'll let you figure out the hashtag.  First one to guess it gets some boobie tassles.  (All in reference to an old Adam Sandler movie - Big Daddy anyone?) 

It was also the kids first day of school. 

Everyone was a little exhausted from the excitement of the day but we dropped them off with Gigi anyway.  We talked about going out a different night.  We really did.  But we knew we wouldn't. 

Must.  Capture.  The.  Moment.  

We were going to go to some nice, tame old people restaurant.  It was raining.  And also just a little past 5:30.  That screams salads and crab cakes with a small glass of wine, right? 


It screams damnit-wakeup-new-fancy-asian-fusion-restaurant that is still in soft opening phase.  (We're so cool.) (Also there was LITERALLY no one but us and some happy hour folks in the whole place.)

Miraculously, they didn't laugh at us and, instead, tucked us away in one of these funky, glowing booths and brought us copious amounts of wine and beef.  (Who doesn't want to eat dinner basking in the glow of small asian figurines?)  (Hi horsey!) 

This was my meal.  It came with a salt block to cook my steak.  (WHO DOESN'T WANT A BURNING HOT SALT BLOCK ON THEIR PLATE?) (For the record, it was actually an outstanding meal; though the last few pieces were a bit salty since the block had cooled quite a bit.)  (Thankfully I'm all MMMMM salt.)   

What do you do after half a bottle of wine on a Monday night?  Make your waiter take a photo of you in front of a ridiculous glowing statue.  DRUNK HAIR!  CRAB CAKE AND SALAD CLOTHES!

(Then transfer your sleeping children to their beds and proceed to have one more beer on the front porch while you talk to your sweet 16 year old neighbor (who, by the way, came over to borrow a TI-83; See?  What?  What?  We still have hip calculators!) about how awesome college is and how he should go.  HA.    

That's how YOU do an anniversary, right?  RIGHT!?

(All joking aside, it was a lovely evening.) 


update of the general variety, there will be bullets

  • It took 10 months, 2 weeks and 1 day but Nate asked me what it would be like if Nora wasn't alive and just he was alive.  Ahem. 
  • Nora is stepping.  With her feet.  In the direction of humans and toys.  Sigh.  
  • Both kids start their fall school schedule next Monday which is fantastic (we love our school) but unfortunate because THE WHOLE REST OF THE WORLD STARTED school this week.  (So many cute back to school photos just staring me in the face!)  
  • Karl was gone all last week (Park City, UT from Sunday afternoon to Saturday morning) for a conference.  That's a whole lot of bedtimes and wakeup and meal times all alone with two small children.  It started off SUPER rough - I picked up the world's scariest looking case of pink eye and both the kids were running low-grade fevers Sunday night.   Monday was not my best day.  All in all, it was intense but not quite as terrifying as I thought it was going to be. 
  • I am currently repainting Karl and my bedroom a GLORIOUS shade of white.  Project White Out began last night at 9 p.m.  The walls in our bedroom are textured (read: we painted textured paint over classy wood paneling several years back).  We sort of forgot how that texture sucks up paint so we ran out of our meager one gallon around 11 p.m., not an opportune time to procure more paint as the paint store = closed.   We both forgot to get more today so, uh, two walls are 'Frost' and two remain 'Atmospheric.'  (Maybe if I confess this it means it will get done tomorrow?!  Must. Not. Stop.)  
  • The dogs were definitely more difficult than the children while Karl was out of town, escaping multiple times and breaking the fence in the same spot we keep fixing.  Fortunately, I have fantastic neighbors who open their gates, lock them in and call me.  Then I have EVEN MORE fantastic neighbors who come sit with my sleeping baby while I round them up.  (Not that they go far; if Arlo escapes alone he just walks around to the front and sits at the carport door.) Also, Arlo and storms do NOT get along.  It hasn't rained in months, there is a drought in Arkansas but, HOW MANY TIMES DID IT STORM while Karl was gone?  Three.  (Clearly all in the middle of the night.)  
  • I am hosting book club this month - Book Club #34.  We're going to have a party for #50.  What should we do? 
  • I am also (sshhhhhush your mouths) coaching Nate's soccer team.  Don't tell anyone.  Full post to follow on THIS SUBJECT.  Ahem. 
  • My friend Jaime and I recently took a photography class.  It was fantastic and I was all amped a and practicing and, well, then my camera broke.  (d40).  And I took it to The Camera Place and they said I should let it die and go to camera heaven.  (Did you know cameras - in general - have a shutter life?  I did not.  Shutter Life Expectancy.  Apparently, it's a real thing.)  So now I am unsure of what to buy.  
  • My eldest child is obsessed with salmon.  
  • My youngest child is obsessed with, um, no food.  She hates real food (pureed or of the table variety).  Except broccoli.  She likes that.  And rice cakes.   And crayon tips.  Surely she can exist on these alone, yes?  
  • I am off work all week!  (See above bullet about school starting a whole week after everyone else!)  
Wait?  What?  No pictures?!!?  Scandalous.


The two photos, though drastically different, have the same caption:  Business in the front, party in the back!

I should just give her a little trim, right? 



mama mama mama

speaking of moms... 

i have one.

she turned 60 this year.

way back in may.

in my effort to support the post office, i gathered sixty (60!) cards from her family and friends and mailed her one a day starting in mid march.

we received the cards here in arkansas (mostly via the mail) and then nate and i decorated 60 envelopes and re-mailed them to her.  (Post office support yo!)  Nate drew special pictures and words and used a lot of star wars stickers on the numbered envelopes which added additional giggles to the project. 

she saved them on this key ring. 

it.  was.  awesome. 

(and worth all the time and effort.)


quick nerd post :: five things

So, clearly, I love all things nerdy and archivey.  Let's make it a sport: EXTREME ARCHIVING.  (Mostly photographic and blog-like in nature.)  I haven't written a nerd-post about apps and the internet and the whatnot in a while, so, uh, here you go.  Also, this post is going to have a lot of links.  Deal with it.  (Good intro paragraph, right?  Sigh.  I promise I'll try harder.)  

Here are some things I'm into lately: 
1. Instagram.  I still love it.  You can find me - kat22stl.  To see some of my recent IG's go here.   I promise you don't want to miss such hilariousness as this 'Thug Life' photo. (I mean, if you recall, we did accidentally name our first child after a rapper.  He's just, apparently, living out that dream.) 

damn it feels good to be a gangsta. danjahandz hills.

Anyway, most of you are probably pretty familiar with Instagram (especially since it is now on both iPhone and Android devices), but last week I decided to make my IG's come to life.  With some help.   (I also REALLY like to make my internet-nerdiness print-nerdiness.) I found this site: www.stickygram.com and they helped make my dream come true.  (Just don't tell Karl I spent $45 on magnets, k?) 

They came today (when recieved, I CLEARLY took a photo of them on the fridge and Instagrammed it.  I know, sick.) The magnets are about the size the photos look on your phone and definitely worth every penny.  Thus far, they have made me smile each time I pass the fridge.  Also, if you care, they shipped lightning quick.  I will possibly be spending another $45 in magnets someday soon.  Don't tell Karl.  (Wait, did I say that already?) (Surely your magnet budget is upward of $90/year, no?)  

You ARE welcome. 

2. Viddy.  It's an app and a website (viddy.com).  It's like Instagram.  But with 15-second videos (you can add filters and music).  I made this one of NK.  I'm not that into it yet.  But, perhaps, I could be?  I do take random iPhone videos.  Mostly, I think maybe I need more friends to join?  Ahem. 

3. my365. Also an app and a website (http://my365.in/).  Ya'll know I tried Project365 thing - somewhat successfully - and this makes it easier.  There are several of these apps out there; I just happened to stumble on this one.  Which happens to be made by a Japanese company.  Which happens to make me REAL happy.  (I am addicted to looking at the newly posted photos from my, uh, friends.  See look?  Photos of CATS!  FOOD!  and, uh, 1988 wristbands?!?  (Read: random ass things we photograph.)  Honestly, I didn't want to tell you about this app b/c I didn't want a bunch of your American photos clogging up my feed.  K teases me endlessly about my photo friends but it really makes me smile when hanachan0121 and daikinikki 'heart' my photos.  I have NO IDEA what to do with these photos or if there is a point to uploading one per day but I keep doing it.  (Honestly, I do the whole week or so in one night from my iPhone photo library). 

4. Path (iPhone app).  This is verging into super-geeky territory BUT I do love Path.  It's sort of a beautifully-designed combination of several things - location-based, photos, status, music.... but more intimate than the bookface.  I'm not going to delve into it too deeply (if you are interested, find it.) 

5.  Blog makeover/cleanup.  This IS happening.  This place is out of control.  (And if I'm going to declutter every other space in my life, then I must declutter here as well.) 

Honestly, I feel a little bit like this post makes me look like I stare at my little screen all day and night but I promise I don't.  Mostly, I save it for pre-bed bedtime.  I even have some serious rules when I'm home with the little people - the phone (as a general rule) goes in the other room.  Except, of course, when I need to TAKE A PHOTO.  Hmmmmm perhaps I am in need of an intervention. 


a tale of two moms

These came with Nate's bristle block set.  I'm pretty sure the company intended this to be a mom and a dad (a boy child, a girl child and a dog also came with the set.  clearly.)  but, in Nate's world, they are two mommies (one family) when we play.

Which is awesome and a great time to talk to him about judgement and loving everyone, right?

Except I don't.

I just play with him like it is a normal, everyday thing in some people's worlds. 

Because it is. 

(This post in response to "Chick-Fil-a Day" which I am SO, SO confused about - free speech?! anti-gay?! appreciation?!  jesus?!  NO ONE EVEN KNOWS.)

Edited to add: I do love my friend John's comments suggesting that it's a rather trivial and convenient way for 'Chick-fil-A Christians' (HA!) to express their, uh, super unclear cause.  Though, maybe in some people's worlds, Jesus, perhaps, really does just want an 8-count with fries and a Coke (ahem).